Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Dr. Pepper Anonymous

So I am on day 2 of no Dr Pepper and I really think today I might kill someone before this day is over. I am in a super cranky mood with my students which is totally not like me at all.......I had to go in and change what I was eating today on MFP because the school cafeteria didn't have any baked potatoes so I had a chef salad and only ate the stuff off the top cause the lettuce looked yucky.....I have to work late today so no running will happen today and we have a dang basketball game tonight that doesn't start till 8... I have no clue how long a basketball game even is but I am thinking today its to long...... I never knew that drinking so much Dr Pepper would make me this cranky.... I have sucked down almost 50 oz of water for the day so far which puts me close to my goal of 100 oz a day... I am so tired of being FAT and this time its all or nothing and I am planning on giving it my all......So its time for me to put my big girl panties on and just do it...... So yes I have to work late but I love doing Survival Bunch with my Autistic guys they are the best and love me as much as I love them... I am going to go home and make Tacos which are one of my favorites and even though I have to go to a basketball game at least I get to see KN dance and have a wonderful time with my family..... And tomorrow is a new day.....as for the rest of the week should fly by ... praying I can get a run in on Wed and Friday and then KN is dancing in the Adolphus parade in Downtown Dallas I have watched this parade on TV for so many years and this will be the first time I will get to attend it I am thinking is should be so much fun and a new experience.... Then the same afternoon KE is singing in the CHRISTmas tree lighting for the city we live in which is also going to be a lot of fun since we have gone pretty much every year I can remember ..... and my kids love it and so do I. Sunday I am not doing a dang thing but I might try to get a run in which would be nice.....hope you all have an amazing week and we will see how my DPA goes this week ......Hi I am T and I am addicted to Dr Pepper.........Smooches

Monday, November 26, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving Recap

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Our family had a wonderful time with the family I had the whole week off and was able to get a bunch of stuff done.. which makes me very happy and I love being able to be productive. The kids were with their dad this year for Thanksgiving and they went to Oklahoma for a few days and had a great time with their Aunt and Uncle and cousins out there. I was super happy to have them home on Friday so we put up our CHRISTmas Tree and went to the parade of lights in downtown for the 15 year in a row..... We love it and its our family tradition to go and see all the lighted floats and our friends dancing in the parade. We also got to watch AG dance in the pre parade performance.  We spent the rest of the weekend hanging around the house and had a second Thanksgiving dinner on Sunday with the kids so they were able to have some of their favorite things... like mac and cheese and cornbread dressing.... which are also 2 of my favorites... I spent Thursday with my family hanging out at my house and eating lots of yummy food that my mom made... She is the best.... I got some awesome family news that I cant share yet but I will be able to soon.... We are very excited about it...... We also got some bad news in that my ex is refusing to sign the papers that he had said he would sign and so now they wont be getting filed this week and so now I am just praying we will get this crap done before Jan..... That would be nice..... I do not do Black Friday shopping and so I only have a few CHRISTmas things bought so far and so I really need to get my rear in gear and get it done.... I already know what I am getting the kids but have no clue on the HTB and what to get him.... Papa is very hard to buy for and I know he wants things like weights and a bike but I am not sure if I want to do that or not.....I guess I will just have to see what he wants.....  Well I hope you all have a great week and I will be back soon ..... Our first basketball game is tomorrow for KN to dance at...Guess I will have to learn to like basketball.....

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Foto Friday

Our homecoming game for the year
 KN sitting with us during the 3rd quarter
 Preforming on the fields at half time
 KN and her Friend ET at the game.....OMG it was cold
 KN and Mrs N ...... Best teacher ever.....We love her
 This is what you look like when you head to walmart the night before a game....Walmart. com anyone
Leaving the field from her first homecoming....It was wonderful we all had a great time other then it was freezing cold that night and now we are back in the 80s the fun things in Texas

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

AG Birthday

Today is Nov the 6th which is AG birthday.... She would have been 9 years old today I look back on the last 7 years since she has past and am not sure how I feel like I have been dealing with it. I think I mostly shut down and just don't deal with it. In our super busy lives since her passing I have barely time to do anything much less feel like I have grieved this great lose.  Parents are not suppose to bury their children but sadly it is something I had to do. I hate that my other children have had to struggle with the lose of their sister and that they are not the same happy go lucky kids that they should be. They miss their sister I think even more then they ever even let me know. She is still a daily part of our lives. We talk about her often and she is never far from our minds. I have trouble coming to terms with the fact I am still mad. Mad at her for disobeying me and going outside unsupervised or the fact she had never gone around the pool at all before that day. That if she had not she would be a happy health 3rd grader doing normal things like math and learning to read and write. Also that I would get to see those stunning blue eyes everyday and that fiery red hair and temper that she had... Thought I would never miss that temper but I do.... Hearing her laugh so loudly and playing with her siblings. I know she is in Heaven and one day we will all be together again. Until that day I miss her and love more then words can even express...... everyone tells me that time heals and it does get better but so far it just get worse and harder every year. I hate the way this affects my 3 living children and KE the most. She is so sad most days and tries so hard to be a normal 10 year old but most 10 year old children have not lost their best friend and sister. So this is just a look into a grieving families life....

This is a poem my oldest KN found and it is very true.....

.Her hair was up in a ponytail
her favorite dress tied with a bow
today was daddy's day at school
and she couldn't wait to go
but her mommy tried to tell her
that she probably should stay home
why the kids might not understand
if she went to school alone
but she was not afraid
she knew just what to say
what to tell her classmates
of why he wasn't there today
but still her mother worried
for her to face this day alone
and that is why once again
she tried to keep her daughter home
but the little girl went to school
eager to tell them all
about a dad she never sees
a dad who never calls
there were daddies along the wall in the back for everyone to meet
children squirming impatiently
anxious in their seats
one by one the teacher called
a student from the class
to introduce their daddy,
as seconds slowly passed
at last the teacher called her name
every child turned to stare
each of them was searching a man who wasn't there
she went to the front of the class
as she smiled up at her mom
and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on
and with hands behind her back
she slowly began to speak
and from out the mouth of a child came words incredibly unique
'my daddy couldn't be here
because he lives so far away
but i know he wishes he could be
since this is such a special day
and though u cannot meet him
i wanted you to know
all about my daddy and how much he loves me so
he loved to tell me story
she taught me to ride my bike
he surprised me with pink roses
and taught me to fly a kite
we used to share fudge sundaes
and ice cream in a cone
and though you cannot see him
I'm not standing here alone
cause my daddy is always with me
even though we are apart
i know because he told me he'll forever be in my heart"
with that her little hand reached up
and lay across her chest
feeling her own heart beat
beneath her favorite dress
and from somewhere in the crowd of dads
her mother stood in tears
proudly watched her daughter
who was wise beyond her years
she finished with a voice so soft
but its message clear and loud...
'i love my daddy very much
hes my shining star
and if he could, he'd be here
..but heavens just too far' her hair was up in a ponytail her favorite dress tied with a bow today was daddy's day at school and she couldn't wait to go but her mommy tried to tell her that she probably should stay home why the kids might not understand if she went to school alone but she was not afraid she knew just what to say what to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today but still her mother worried for her to face this day alone and that is why once again she tried to keep her daughter home but the little girl went to school eager to tell them all about a dad she never sees a dad who never calls there were daddies along the wall in the back for everyone to meet children squirming impatiently anxious in their seats one by one the teacher called a student from the class to introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed at last the teacher called her name every child turned to stare each of them was searching a man who wasn't there she went to the front of the class as she smiled up at her mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on and with hands behind her back she slowly began to speak and from out the mouth of a child came words incredibly unique my daddy couldn't be here because he lives so far away but i know he wishes he could be since this is such a special day and though u cannot meet him I wanted you to know all about my daddy and how much he loves me so he loved to tell me stories he taught me to ride my bike he surprised me with pink rose and taught me to fly a kite we used to share fudge sundae and ice cream in a cone and though you cannot see him I'm not standing here alone cause my daddy is always with me even though we are apart I  know because he told me he'll forever be in my heart"with that her little hand reached up and lay across her chest feeling her own heart beat beneath her favorite dress and from somewhere in the crowd of dads her mother stood in tears proudly watched her daughter who was wise beyond her years she finished with a voice so soft but its message clear and loud...'i love my daddy very much hes my shining star and if he could, he'd be here ..but heavens just too far'